On Thursday night, I decided to do an open mic performance at the Gypsy Den here in the OC. I haven’t done many live performances…..in fact, this was only my second. And, it was the first time I played the guitar myself….last time I had a friend of mine play for me (that was before I had a guitar and started to learn). Part of the reason why there was such a big gap between my first performance and this last one (about 10 months) was because I told myself after my first performance that I wouldn’t do another one until I could play the song myself. It was part of my way of motivating myself to finally pick up the guitar and learn to play. I had always wanted to, growing up. I just never did. And I don’t have any really good reason why I waited so long. I guess I just thought it would be too hard….then, other stuff seemed more important at the time….then, finally, I thought I don’t want to be one of those people who says, “Oh, I wish I would have…”
There are still quite a few things to check off my “Oh, I wish I would have..” list, and I’m not sure if I can say I’ve quite “learned to play” the guitar…just barely. But, it is a start. And, after this performance, I feel very satisfied in that I kept my vow to myself. Although the song I picked just happened to be about the easiest one I could have chosen, I did it and it felt great. Yes, the nerves were there….especially earlier on in the day. I always get nervous! But, for some reason as my turn to go up came closer, I settled a bit. I thought, “I just want to go up there and sing. I’m not going to stress about whether or not they like it or hate it. I just want to sing and be in the moment and do it with heart.” And I can honestly say that is what I did. I took it all in. All the sounds of the people talking, the noises of the baristas blending milk and coffee into a frothy foam, the big, happy smile of my son’s face in the crowd, the two guys up front trying to add a little harmony to the song as I sing. Then….they are all gone. I forget they are all there and get lost….my heart opens and is free. Great moment….great feeling. So glad I was able to get over the nerves and just be there.
Anyway, here is the audio of the performance (no, I couldn’t get a video this time:(. If you listen carefully, you’ll hear a little rascal’s voice at the end:).